I like the name aiden. he likes stella. I told him they're coming out of my vagina, and I will name them what I damn well please. Stella goes.
Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
Im already sauced. Have been for hours. Its kinda my thing.
Family of uber douches all wearing ed hardy in a hummer taking up 2 parking spots at starbucks. Please be more cliche
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just sold back the books i vomitted on
So the girl in front of me was buying champagne too .. I wanted to be like "so are you celebrating clean test results too?"
I just realized I'm not towing a trailer. I thought this whole drive home I was towing a trailer. Wow too high
She just face-timed her mom and had her watch all of us toast to her grandmas tits..
It's like the god of all feather dusters, but for your vagina
It really is the softest mustache
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
came home to a trail of roses from the door halfway up the stairs. but my nonsingle roommate lives downstairs. idk if they celebrated on the stairs or if some girl tried to woo me last night and i don't remember
She had like a side ponytail and hoop earrings though. And legwarmers. Like a horrible 80s nightmare. Don't drink and dream, dude.
I DONT HAVE THE SOCIAL SKILLS TO EXPLAIN THAT YOU DIED EATING MY PUSSY
Babe if there was a way to give a back rub and head at the same time that's what I would ask for my birthday, Christmas and of course right now. Please think about how and get back to me.
I learned the hard way a garbage bag will not save you when jumping from a tree at 2am
Any who, I expect to be showered with roses apon my arrival
How about beer and nachos?
A fine substitute!
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