Smith looks like a guy that goes on a lot of first dates
do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
I can't believe you blew on her face.
I feel that every long term relationship needs at least one big,load delivered straight between the eyes.
I thought I was at a rave until the paramedics started chasing me. You win again tequila.
i just assumed he broke up with her because she wasn't a freshman anymore
I'm gonna die fat and alone and all they will find is pizza crusts
this guy had a colored tattoo of Chucky on his leg, whatever drugs he does, i want them
The birthday girl is bringing her own barf bucket, it is going to be a good weekend.
THIS IS THE EMERGENCY BOOZE SYSTEM. I AM EN ROUTE TO DEWITT WITH A FIFTH OF TEQUILA. THIS IS NOT A TEST
We can't tell anyone we fucked because I'm still trying to get with your friend. Is she coming next weekend?
I'm drunk in a place called Lick-A-Chick. PS. It's not a lesbian hot spot, they sell chicken.
My mom just told me she would flash her tits to a cop to get me out of jail, and then we high-fived.
It's hot as dicks out. Lets get drunk on the roof and make pterodactyl sounds at people.
I sharted in my christmas pjs :(
My cat is sitting in the window watching the neighbor's dogs doing it. I think she's lonely too.
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