I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
I just made $100 from people paying me not to get naked at the party... I need those P90X dvds
i'm sitting in the library realizing that the 2 most productive things i did this weekend was have sex and go to the liquor store...
It never fails.. every time I have a dick in my mouth he calls me.
He brought Stephanie home from the black light party. Apparently he has night vision beer goggles
Dude.. You paid a stripper $50 to listen to you cry last night.
Hey wes just called me saying he was asleep outside by the pond at my apt complex
Can't promise anything, there's vodka in my thermos
You looked at my sister and yelled at her saying in a couple of years she will be yours
When the shrooms kicked in we both simultaneously realized we were not the right puzzle piece for the dubstep puzzle.
We made eye contact and were like we are not welcome here, the ravers are onto us and we need to get the fuck out before we get shuffled upon
sounds like it. if it makes you feel better i blew up a $75000 farm tractor last night.
SHUT UP I CAN'T HEAR YOU OVER THE SOUND OF UKULELE AND LONLINESS
You yelled to anyone that tried to help you "I have a burrito, what else could a girl want?"
I had to bail out of the tour de Franzia because I have class Saturday morning. Grad school is ruining my life
Nah, I was done when the Big Pun lookalike began to sob and tell me I looked like his ex...
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