Meh. I'll learn enough German to ask her for a handjob, then I'm out
You never cease to amaze me.
I just feel like a little gay dolphin in a massive sea
Hows that studying goin for you?
I'm in my bathtub in a robe and jeans smoking a bowl and my hair is covered in olive oil
Also he wants to know a casual, consise way to ask a girl in a bar if he could eat her out. Think on that.
Yeah. I don't think I have anything left in me tho. I think I was throwing up tangible memories at one point.
I would eat the Denny's grand slam special out of my new probation officers b hole
It was going very smoothly until she noticed my boner of hope.
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
I need to hire someone full-time to slap food and dick away from me.
Why don’t they have healthy alcohol yet?
I dont pretend to understand how the heterosexual mind works. Its a mysterious cavern of stupidity and disgusting sexual acts.
I don't know whether to cheer for the free bourbon, or cry from the screaming children.
She put her coat on went to leave and called me an asshole. I responded with "I never said I wasn't" and then she pounced on me like a cat on cat nip.
They were shocked that I could handle my liquor so well. I'm half Irish and half Russian. This is what I'm made for
we went to the skate park then back to her house for dinner, and somehow that ended with her making me blueberry pancakes at 2am
Randomize
