I think i sorta joined a cult last night
South Carolina's governor once cited "moral legitimacy" when he was a congressman voting for President Bill Clinton's impeachment. Karma is a bitch.
you kept yelling at her to "show me your genitals" until the bouncers told us to leave...at which point you showed them YOUR genitals...
please don't ever take me to a strip club again...
Any parent would be proud to have a daughter that's a blowjob fairy
He's getting me an energy drink and said good morning beautiful. He must sense i'm cutting him off from the sex.
omg his dad is hot
... I'm currently away at the moment. Leave a msg since I cannot express how much I can't help you stop ruining peoples lives.
she is like a cock bee. instead of going from flower to flower she goes from cock to cock
He compared my blow job skills to finding gold treasure in a gold chest, so there's that.
I want to get a list going called "D list celebs I've kissed"
We smoked a huge blunt and then laid in bed naked eating strawberry shortcake good humor bars. We have the perfect relationship.
also I can check "jump into a moving car" off my bucket list if that tells you how tonight is going
I thought I needed to get laid. Turns out I just needed pasta.
Most people would agree that it IS in fact slutty to give someone head for free ice cream.
Just do what I do and listen to your vagina. She’ll growl when she smells good dick
oh dont worry mom i am not sick my cough is from a recent increase in recreational drug use
that will happen
Randomize
