It's a miracle Ok Typing texts toYou right now
I looooooove Saturdays!!!!!!!
I am absolutely hammered
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
I cant talk about it right now or let you guess, but its something you and i would do. Kinda like that time we had the case of beer and went bowling
You hooked up with minors in a golf cart?
rumor has it I kept asking you to go to the "tall grass" with me...sorry about that.
The amount of alcohol I'm going to consume on my birthday is directly proportional to the amount of shit I've had to put up with this past year. Which is a lot.
Hungover/still slightly drunk at work. Opened a bag of cheese with a box cutter. Pretty sure I need stitches.
We went to the casino to try to earn enough money to go to new Orleans comfortably. I'm already drunk. This is a horribly immoral start to summer.
We've cranked the heat for blizzard versions of all of our strip games. Come over.
I think I need a restraining order. I had 15 "selfies" of him on my camera roll......my phone has a lock code on it.
She looks well worn, presumably from a cavalcade of penis.
Is it OK to disqualify a potential therapist if she lists 50 Shades of Gray as her favorite book? Or is that a good thing?
I almost took a picture but it looked like he might have a shank and I'm just not at a place in my life where I could handle having tetanus
I asked him to explain what he meant by "hooking up" in paragraph form
He ripped down his Kate Upton poster while we were having sex last night. Im gonna take that as a good sign.
40 year old guy made out with me last night while I had French fries in my mouth
Randomize