i never knew gatorade would taste just as good on the way back up
We are allowed to think Jacob from Twilight is hot in 468 days!
I don't know what is sadder, the fact that you figured that out or the fact that I can't wait until then!!
you ate skittles off the table like a hungry hungry hippo. it was awesome.
I learned an important lesson last night: Jameson giveth, but Jameson also taketh away.
Cruelly.
I just had a flash of me drinking straight vodka out of a condom...
You almost hooked up with 200lb woman in her mid-forties, because you were convinced she was adele. Your drinking problem is officially out of control.
I went around and congratulated every guy that had a beard for having one
Goddamn tequila
Some old truck driver just made me smell his beard I hope tonight turns out better
I blacked out after you got about 8 goldfish out of the tank and put them in your pockets. We're not allowed back. It was a sucky Walmart anyway...
He left npr on the whole time when we were doing it. ironic that i lost it on the 100th anniversary of the titanic. thanks michelle norris.
Smoked a joint with my old camp counselor and now we're going to a strip club. There is a god.
She called it a palate cleanser. She and her friend dike it out once a year before returning to dick
Together or do they pick up? How far do they go? IS AN AUDIENCE PERMITTED? GODAMIT ANSWERS MAN!!!!!!
No worries I have vodka. Its always on time
I feel like I'm in a development meeting for a Lifetime original movie.
I knew she was the one when we had sex to the halo soundtrack.
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