umm..so Dad's wearing a thong, I don't know what to do
put a dollar in it?
While she was crying about breaking up, he looked at her through his fork and said "of course she's upset, she's in jail." Having sex with him tonight.
when your hometown is famous for abortion clinic bombings, hurricanes, and jude law's newest bastard, its probably time to move.
...She then said get into the spirit and started making firecracker noises while having sex
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't believe im sexting my roommate. This is really what my life has come to
the elusive kegmastree, who's mystery is only exceeded by it's power
I can hear her moaning. I'm on some random guy's counter. He wanted me to cuddle but I said I didn't know how.
"Let's chug a beer then make out" doesn't sound as nice, but it would prob make him cum right there.
Triple a is towing cars for free tonight and tomorrow night. Can we take advantage of this ?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just passed a kid trying to leave on a lawn mower
I woke up and they were watching power rangers in japanese so I just found my bra and left
Hey I'm sorry for head butting you last night. Personally I thought it was funny at the time, but I can see how from your perspective it may not have been as enjoyable for you... Hope your lip is okay.
Hmm, peanut butter and Xanax. Next Ben and Jerry's flavor.
I just wish the first erections of my life didn't take place at a dentists office but hey whatever I turned out alright
we're so committed to being not committed
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