i just remebered what i did last night, i asked a homeless man on a bike "hey whatcha doin with that bike, wanna make 5 bucks?" he agreed and then rode me on his handle bars a block away to the next bar.
I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
I got a handjob from a sober married woman in a parking lot in the middle of the day, yet you still cant manage to get laid by a drunk single slut at the bar at 1am. Wtf
his dick makes me think maybe a monogamous relationship forever is possible.
He came when he saw that my nipples were pieced
I say go for the trifecta and maybe you'll get a medal or something. Or a baby. That's like the same thing right?
Took "drink until he's cute" to a whole new level last night...
Well I guess I'll go shower now and wash all the stripper off.
His brother just asked him in all seriousness if it would be cool if they became eskimo brother brothers.
The profile of her ass is just unreal. Weird way to use profile I know, but never more accurate
My one regret (beside the inevitable shit storm that followed) is that now I can't fuck his cute friend.
I'm abstinent now
Oh, is this one of the times when you're serious?
I think I'm gonna cut my hair just so I stop waking up with semen in it
All I need is a morbidly obese man masturbating at the other end of the car and I'll complete the CTA Horror Trifecta.
He may be 6' 6" but I'm 180 lbs of pure rage and determination
Randomize
