smell like capt'n and strawberry champagne
Id like to know where dora the explorers parents are when she goes on all these crazy ass adventures
She's dressed as Musafa. How could this not be a good idea?
just threw all of the fireworks into the bonfire. thats why there are firetrucks.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dont worry about it. i always have emergency bong water with me
I just had to dig under a pile of condoms in my desk drawer to get to a blue book. Summer is officially over.
Had sex and ran 2.8 miles all before 7:30am. This is going to be a very productive Monday.
New Halloween costume idea: Frankenstorm. We have three hours. Make it work.
I have decided that today will be all about indulgence and hedonism.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dry heaving on campus is my new low. Also, go pats
There's just something so liberating about drinking a beer with no pants on
Our house drank 90 beers yesterday afternoon before 8pm so add that to the list
You know tonight's gonna be a good night when your already planning on sleeping in a trunk
Drunk purchased a negligee, plan b, keds and Himalayan salt shot glasses.. there’s only one reasonable purchase there, and we both know it’s not the sneakers
This Cougar is looking at me like I’m a piece of meat and buying me top shelf cocktails
I’m getting a fear boner thinking about what she might do to me
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