I think scott just propositioned me for sex
Apparently at one point I was wearing my sweatshirt backwards like it was normal and then I threw up into the hood. Never drinking again.
I love that she's always that person who people think it's a good idea to invite her to something. and then she's there and you realize, "nope."
He is going overseas for 8 months, not only was that blowjob a going away present, but i was supporting the troops
You're the only person i know who can laugh and talk while puking
Remeber when I drunkenly made out with him this summer while he was getting bitched at by his girlfriend on the phone? Yeah, neither do I. But I'm pretty sure that same thing happened again last night.
He graduated with honors. I've seen him kneeboard on dry ground and run a razor scooter into a wall...anyone can graduate with honors
dude I'm not 100% but I think your mom is sexting me.
it's not like this is the first time she's brought a guy home and I'm the one who hooks up with him
I don't really know how to explain this place...it's like I feel like I need an std just to fit in
Regardless of the amount of alcohol you may consume tonight - DON'T take anybody home
My dad just sent me a text reminding me to bring the family beer pong championship belt. Thanksgiving 2012 just got real
I just got invited to party with a bunch of elderly lesbians I am in no position to offer life advice
He also has scotch. LOTS AND LOTS of scotch. I think you'd like him!
That is always a wonderful personality trait!
I swear it’s like he’s filling my soul via my vagina
we went to the skate park then back to her house for dinner, and somehow that ended with her making me blueberry pancakes at 2am
Randomize
