apparently, "please pick me up from the airport" also means "i got drunk on the flight and need to give you roadhead in broad daylight"
and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
And then I'm going to yell into her vagina and see if it echoes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I drove you home. there is no excuse for wrecking your car 3 hours later.
As I was going down on her I noticed she had a tatoo on her inner thigh that said "Eat it like your birthday cake".
You guys seriously fuck to bieber? That's embarrassing...
I want to be done crawling through windows but the sex is too good to stop...but I'm running out of excuses for where the bruises on my legs are coming from.
They said an hour before I even see a doctor...and they noticed the shots tally on my arm.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Idk. I was speaking metaphorically. Go for it. As one of your bad decisions, I feel confident in saying you've done worse.
i dont get why youre mad at me. i promised you he looked like jim morrison and you failed to ask me like which era
he told me to take care of him and then he asked me to walk him to his hotel. I already have a pussy. I don't need another one
Well, I got drunk and told my family about what I expected sexually after a good first date.
I’ve gone two rounds already this morning and I’m ready for a third. The moon is in the house of sluticus hornius.
i just cleaned my bong... I do not feel healthy
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