I'm lost and stupid without you.
Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
just woke up in the beanbag bin at walmart
He told me his condom was going to expire tomorrow and he needed to use it. I can't believe I fell for it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He corrected me on my grammar when I came. Fuck English majors.
Were gonna hotbox in the trunk. I think there's room for another half of a person if you're interested
His sombrero wouldn't fit in the car and I had to buy him some Jack to make him stop bitching. You owe me
Shits getting dirty between us in her dad's bedroom. I'm talking early millennium rap and r&b
We should drive around in your Jeep on snow days and get stoned while we help random strangers stuck in the snow. So much good karma.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I received a sext from my girlfriend, and a deal for free chips and guacamole at chipotle at the same time. I have tasted heaven, and it is beautiful.
Sending out old nude selfies with the message "#tbt"
You should feel special! You're also the only person I've ever punched during sex
I pay 3K a month for rent, yet last nite I broke into the back of my building, scaled over 2 tons of garbage in heels and took a dirty freight elevator to my floor just so my doorman wouldn't see how fucked up I was
U know ur prob on camera right?
How drunk are you?
Completed.
National tequila day this year falls on a Monday. I've never been more disappointed in my life.
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