He only uses me for sexual pleasure. The sad part is I don't even feel like a slut. I just I feel like I should just live in the top drawer of his nightstand....for free of course.
Just saw the pics you left in my phone. thanks for reminding me that last night was not a dream.
If we were to wake in ur bed together, what are the 3 words you would say to me?
Get out now.
I find out next week of the Australian was lying about his vasectomy or not. Keep your fingers crossed!
Never ever ever ever ever ever give your number to a 30 year old at buffalo wild wings. Ever ever ever.
I figured out plans for New Year's and by figuring out I mean I've got a sugar bowl of cocaine. Start at 10?
Traded my phone for pizza, then got it back this morning....successful night
I mean jail does seem alright, all the free broth you can eat.
Only I could go on a date with one guy, have a beer with a different guy and go home with the guy im trying to avoid. I have a talent or a problem.
Alas my dad DD'd me. Legit cock blocked to the highest degree
I was intimate with him for twenty minutes and will be intimate with shame for twenty years.
He told me I had smoking hot areolas then he wins an executive of the year award. How does that even happen?
If there was a category for "most likely to end up a serial killer" in your high school yearbook then I'm sure you would have won it
things i am: 1) still drunk 2) still wearing my leopard onesie 3) still gonna make my 9am lecture despite the odds CAN I GET A HIGH FIVE
i'll explain later but cookie monster is playing the xylophone
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