I saw his package. It spoke to me.
somehow you got everyone naked by playing strip rock paper scissors.
He had a huge mole on his dick. Genetics has cockblocked him for life.
Dude I think I vomited on the wireless internet box too...it isnt working.
the guy was wearing a viagra shirt, i knew what i got myself into.
The interviewer had a hook for his right hand I TRIED TO SHAKE HIS HOOK WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME
We need to get sombreros so I can give them to strippers.
That was the first time I have seen a confused expression with a dick in the mouth
He equated my biology degree to a belief in Santa. I wonder if he heard the doors to my vagina clanging shut.
Would you go as one half of Harry and Lloyd in Tuxes to Aaron's wedding?
with the possibility that i could very easily fall in love with him and i've actually talked to my HUSBAND about it
SOS YOU NEED TO TAKE THE CANDY PANTIES OUT OF THE GLOVE COMPARTMENT BEFORE MOM TAKES MY CAR
Easy. Go to walmart, buy a bag of charcoal. everyone gets a present and it's cheap.
Also I've accepted I am not going to be a catch today. I look like a dead hooker and the remedial work is going to be patchy at best with the shakes I've got.
I knew it was love when he told me he wants to see me have multiple orgasms in one night
Randomize
