The dr is doing well, he randomly asked if I was bi
Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
my debutante medallion kept hitting his balls when i went down on him
help me choose which girl to send myself boning to my girlfriend to make her want to break up
which one looks the most like her?
After all the hair products he's stolen from me, he better fucking be gay.
Tomorrow night wont work for me. I'm talking with Bryan about marriage and I dont want to have a shroom hangover.
Steve is gonna hang his bear rug on the wall because he doesn't trust us not to have sex on it...
as soon as I stop standing here with one leg up on my bathroom counter admiring my balls, I'm going to go tan. and then you may come over.
Oh my god. You have got to get off that breast feeding support group. They're on to you, dude.
You talked the cab driver into taking a shot from your flask at a red light because "Ray Charles would want him to"
Can I also remind you that we insisted on touching his mustache?
Well of course I remember it took up like 20 minutes of my night.
as much as I don't like snorting drugs, I would totally be fine with someone doing a line off my ass. that's just a whole new up
I think my teeth are moving, they feel like people.
Why is there a slipper full of piss in my bedroom?
Why are there 17 orders of shrimp lo mein in the bathtub?
Randomize
