Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
She dropped a weight class after every shot I took. I thought I was just drink something magical.
I just pulled a handful of rice out of my pocket.
Where are you and who are these girls passed out on the floor?
and why are they spooning a flamingo?
they traded weed for a spot on our floor. be nice.
For the record, saying you're friends with the owner doesn't work when the owner is the one throwing you out.
No. No. And hell no. If you are driving a Honda Fit you are not allowed to give me a dirty look. No.
duuuude the clock in this car says its 85 past 19.
dear god, who put you in a cab?
He likes bondage and spanking and shit.
Oh, so "normal" kinky not "I wanna pee on people" kinky. I can handle that.
Just realized I could have five different dicks in me the day of valentines day but no real date. My life
I also got a mission for you and you're gonna love it. Biggest. Hospital. Party. Ever.
I was like wtf you can warn a girl like hey I have a huge dick and I fuck for hours
Someone google feeding your vagina Advil and Neosporin
Help everyone's hot
Men are hot women are hot non-binary people are hot aliens are hot
The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???
i sent him a picture of his friend's dick and told him he should really stop thinking he's my only option.
Randomize
