Words of Wisdom: ordering a pitcher of whiskey cokes, putting a straw in it, and calling it your drink is not socially acceptable
We are so in love
so when's the next time you get to see your balls
I mean I'm basically single. Or maybe just an asshole. Either way.
I think i'm just gonna start shot-gunning everything that comes in can form.
My mom just blew pot smoke into my nose and called me a cat.
Also pregame at mine tomorrow?
so im sitting outside the gym eating a 20 piece nugget stoned out of my mind, convincing myself this is more productive because im so close to the treadmills.
... I went down on him at the movies. I feel like Alanis Morisette.
Nice. Don't spend your therapist's co-pay on Jaeger bombs.
Duuuude - Drag Queen Bingo wasn't supposed to end like thissss
Its the least I can do really, I mean, I did sleep with her husband...
At least is you came to Milwaukee to visit me you'd get the best mind blowing sex of your life and free wifi. Who doesn't want free wifi!
For not really liking Christmas, I have an astounding amount of holiday-themed lingerie
If I don't quit picking up guys when I'm drunk, I'm going to need a vagina transplant.
I was the only one in group sessions to bring up sex as a stress reliever. Some of those people were awfully judgy despite the fact we were all in a psych ward.
dont know what thebfuxk is in rhat shit, but dont lemme have antmore
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