I thought Christmas was going to come before I did
Dude!! Mom just asked me why you have 'boobies' hahaha
I hate my life
i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
My mom assumed I was crying because he was leaving. Figured that was better than explaining my eye's sensitivity to semen..
I also would have accepted most things ending in "job", erotic favors, and food.
found a rock and smashed the sliding glass door. home safe. screen door is locked so we're good.
what kind of roommate is she really? she wouldn't even hold my hair back.
They're having lesbian sex while I play super mario world. I hope they like the music
at work, .. 47 yr old boss was in a fight. 2 BLACK EYES. I may get fired. I cant stop laughing
....she made me stop for like 3 minutes so she could talk to her cat....
Why is there puke in my guitar?
Because you puked in your guitar.
It is not a successful senior year unless you show up to campus without pants at least once, right?
He was pretty bad, I wanted pizza the whole time.
I need more than 2 fuckable people this is an outrage
I don't care. We're going to fuck. And I WONT apologize in the morning. You cheated on me, so you can cheat on her with me.
Randomize
