I'm not saying he has herpes, I'm just saying he slept with my friend that has herpes.
drunk me is my new role model. he's fearless. like not even afraid of tornadoes.
I'm 99% sure I high fived a girl over mashed potatoes last night
Ive been home for 20 minutes and I'm already in bed with a vodka tonic
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm at a party with half naked strippers driving in a little kids battery powered mustang around a stipper pole in his bedroom
I just sprawled out on my bedroom floor and cried while shoveling chocolate into my mouth.. I should not have Bacardi at home
At what point does "I'm too high to deal with you right now" stop being rude?
No, the moral of my Oxford interview was "Never snort caffeine pills".
He accidentally opened the car door during sex and all the lights came on. Needless to say, that kid passing by who was walking his dog got scarred for life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Summary of my night: made out with a complete stranger at a club dressed in the Geico gecko costume...
I'm playing drinking games with a boy who looks like Liam Hemsworth. I think I'm fine.
Helped a guy at work today that did nothing but stare at my chest....safe to say the Girls were looking G.O.O.D. today.
None of these texts make sense. except for "step 2.5 equals velociraptor." that i get.
I just want you to know you're the worst sister ever.
If this is about me and your ex, it's not my fault she doesn't like men.
I've been in town for almost 36 hrs and I haven't made out with a stranger yet - I consider THAT a record!
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