Are you okay?
Don't worry. Self-respect preserved. My speech was Grey's quality... I made him cry.
you laugh because clearly you have never had to clean poop out of a tub
I told her the white crusty stuff on my boxers was frosting not cum. She seemed MORE grossed out then
Let's just say for some reason we thought it was okay to make a burrito smoothie.
She was asian and in a relationship... my two weaknesses
I have come to the conclusion that if you don't fulfill your life ambitions you should go into porn
she trying to cartwheel up the stairs... not going so well
My roommate says its rare that you can be tear gassed before you lose your virginity so i feel accomplished in life
I'm pretty sure we scarred one of our coworkers. This is the second time he has caught us both fully undressed and banging at work.
Either he has bad timing or he wants to join.
Currently siting in the living room naked, staring at one of the girls across the street in her living room naked. This is like the most intense starting contest of all time.
Taking my underwear off at work was one of my better decisions this weekend
We just catapulted a jelly bean off of his hard dick into his mouth.......Happy Easter!
I can't tell if this is a hangover or just a perfect combination of shame and regret
Yeah well, last time I said I wasn't having a big night I was being strangled in somebody's spare bed
Someone puked in my crockpot. Your friends can’t come over any more.
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