no weekend plans? you're practically married
just without the last name or joint bank account
i'd advise against both
ugh, i have officially sinned in all of my cute clothes. i can't even wear any of them without feeling regret.
i learned a valuable lesson last night. sometimes nice girls finish first. twice.
Any day that starts with a call from my ex-bf... crying... is a good day.
You realize we can hear you jacking off in your room, right?
I like it rough
i've decided that sluts are like cars. they may look good as hell on the outside, but you never know what kind of shit is hiding under the hood.
thats because you have standards... and i have a thing for guys that give me free drugs.
He wanted to have sex in a church because he has keys to it from court-ordered community service. WHAT IS STANDARDS?
Nothing says I love you as your fiancé bringing back home your drunk brother from his own stag party
He and I are in a competition of who can sleep with the most people at work. We're tied at two. I could win this if they'd stop hiring damn straight girls.
As I took my shirt off he commented on how great my boobs where. I responded with "thanks, I grew them myself"
Well I'm back. Could you fill me in on what I missed?
You don't want to know. Trust me.
I got a lap dance in honor of your birthday last night.
Thank you.
theres a video...
oh god.
the guy had "bad bitches only" tattooed above his penis...
I just put my eye make up on in the bathroom of the bar.... I may be too comfortable here....
Randomize
