That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
Spotted: Pepto Bismol pink Scion with Ed Hardy sticker on front window, air freshener, and seat covers. Total Douchette Mobile.
When I saw him standing at full height, I realized exactly how much his body structure reminds me of his penis.
I can tell how much and what I drank by my morning shits
Oh my god you would drunk register for a marathon.
Hm. I declare blue a flavor.
so I finished the entire bottle...next thing I know, it's 8 am and I wake up on the fucking beach in the low tide with a family standing about 30 feet from me just staring.
You stressed the importance of not breaking the seal too early... and then proceeded to piss your pants when you sneezed.
I came home to my brother stoned out of his mind. He got a high score on COD and asked me to have a celebration yogurt with him.
I think he's in need of mouth to penis resuscitation. Which I happen to be certified
I feel like I have to sign a death waver before I have sex with him...
You need to call dibs on the blond with the tits. It's your birthday.
Haha hell yea
Because if someone gets to see those.. It should be you. It's like God telling you Happy Birthday.
Mistakes were made. Hot mistakes that I want to make again. But tapping your employee is def a mistake. Esp in front of two other employees.
He stopped in the middle of us banging in order to check in for his Southwest flight.
Randomize
