Writing my paper on freud at bar
??
Going up to girls and asking if they were anal explosive or anal retentive as children
Smooth
apparently i broke a 100 dollar bill to tip the bartender on a free drink
Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
He's doing the single life. He recently finished like a 3 year relationship. You can't date him.
But I don't want to date him. I just want to look at him. Naked. And in my bed.
She's like the Michael Jordan of alcoholism
My phone saved "first signs of pregnancy" as a most visited search.
It's not even like I care. He was cute 30lbs ago and before he fucked that Michael Jackson look alike.
Happy heartbreak day....you got chocolates, I'm eating them/ throwing them out the window at passing couples
im suggesting it to him. and by suggesting i mean we're not having sex again unless im wearing high heels
and i think wearing the clothes from last night are out of the question...was there mud wrestling there? because i look like a participated..with a cat.
What changed your mind?
Being sober
I just can't do Wednesdays sober anymore
Update. A gay dude just told me I'm the most beautiful thing with a vagina he as ever seen. How should I feel about this?
is it just me or does "lol" kill any sort of vibe while sexting?
Currently standing at the bus stop in just a pillowcase and its fucking snowing
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