Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
He doesn't need a wingman, he needs a miracle
When i asked him what happened all he said was, the toucan... the toucan... over and over again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Two portable blenders. We are going to be popular and dangerous.
I've taken to hiding pictures of us around his room so that he'll forever feel guilty for dumping me on Valentine's Day... And to potentially cock block any hook ups.
There's a big bag of salt and vinegar chips and a Budweiser for when you wake up. Don't say I never did anything for you.
Just spent 15 minutes trying to save the life of a fruit fly that dive-bombed my coffee. I figured it doesn't make sense to let two souls die in this place...
Yeah. I've decided no relationship can survive me shoving my boobs in the guys face
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We thought we were getting kicked out but then he started tickling the bouncer. Next thing you know the bouncers giving him a piggy back ride to the bar.
Well, I tried to shit into my refrigerator. It was a rough night.
Finally liberated my Star Trek DVD from my booty call's house. Captain Kirk would be so proud.
She's hot and all. It's just I don't want to become Eskimo brothers with my sister
I climbed to the top of a stripper pole and touched the ceiling. Accomplishment?
If I lock her out of the apartment right now would the neighbors have grounds to sue?
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