I puked in the AC vent. thing are gonna get ugly come summertime.
do you ever think like no deep thought could take place in the spanish language? like all they talk about is like tacos?
how high are you?
The Angel on my shoulder is now resorting to merely reminding me that, "You will regret this later." I'm not sure if he's learning how I think or just giving up. Either way, should make life a bit more interesting.
I understand why they say don't drink the water in Mexico... I just saw 5 guys piss upstream of where the bar tender went to get the water
i think smoking weed in a ladies bathroom on the beach with two dudes might be the shadiest thing ive done in a while
We 6 way cheers-ed with French fries last night, hammered, in the booth.
We were having sex in the gardens when the grounds keeper walked up on us. He gave me a thumbs up and walked away
The secret to finals week is to have an orgasm for every point you need on the test before you take it.
I'm really sorry I hooked up with your student on the dance floor..
My dad is blowing up my phone with pictures from the midget wrestling match.
I am never drinking with the goths again.
Hows your mom
Shes good, she claims she wasnt drunk
I just bought a handle of tequila and a breakfast burrito. I might be out of money for the weekend, but at least I have the necessities covered.
It wasn't as awesome as they lead everyone to believe. No stripper. Ran out of booze. The chipmunk. He was real.
Guuuuurrrrrl! He ate the 🌮like it contained the Covid-19 vaccine!
Randomize
