I haven't been laid since Bush was president.
I hate seeing commercials about babies when i'm high
Yeah, I don't like babies at all
He never called back after I emailed him my booty call contract.
The doctor wrote 'condom retrieval' on my discharge paper.
Well as our DD it was my responsibility to get us home safely. If that meant strapping you down to the backseat using all 3 seatbelts then so be it.
They want me to get them some X for there wedding present. I'm on the way to get it now
It was weird. Like "Mom, Dad, here's a guy who knows my orgasm face".
You looked at my sister and yelled at her saying in a couple of years she will be yours
You screamed "there will be blood" and punched some random guy in the face. So no, we can't go back to that bar.
Moments after comforting her about her boyfriend issues I found myself in the other room showing him my tits.
I just can't even fathom the crazy and I work at a mental hospital.
Just because he told you it was safe doesn't mean you should have licked it.
I'm trying to drink up the confidence to run in public.
I was left to my own devices with nothing to do but drink
But what is a man profited, if he should gain Joe Biden and lose Alex Trebek?
Randomize
