so she proceeds to puke everywhere, look up at me like a sick dog, and then say, "i'll finish if you want me to."
Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
I knew I was high when I wanted to write a poem about how great it felt to wash my face
im never drinking wine from a person in a wet suit and goggles ever again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
everything was going well until edgar threatened to handcuff the security guard to himself.
I might've decided it was a good idea to try to steal all of the pool balls at the pub... I apologize in advance that we now need to become regulars somewhere (anywhere) else.
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
he may or may not have motorboated me on the steps of the library of congress
In local news, attempts to hide phone from extremely drunk self prove unsuccessful for Dallas woman.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
After we got done he told me to hold his penis because it helps him fall asleep
I decided taking Molly and seeing Birdman seemed like a wise life choice.
Meeting up with one of your students at your drug dealers house is always an awkward moment
For some reason she gave me a handjob. It was all very confusing
Does going to a local bar count as taking part in Small Business Saturday? Asking for a friend
Once upon a time I threw up in my own hands last night.
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