I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
The last thing I remember is you asking me how to grow french fries.
he said i was the most charming throwing up drunk person hes ever taken care of. so of course i had sex with him.
Why was I handcuffed to the roof?
It was easier then trying to explain why you couldn't fly
His bookmark is a piece of toilet paper. No shame there.
I was really sad when you left and cried. And i don't know what a face promise is, but apparently i made you make one.
We had to coat check the pizza.
I don't even know why im sitting in this office eating a poptart.
Passing out on a toilet is not classy no matter what you're wearing. Not even a pea coat.
who orders an old fashioned in 2014? even my Grandparents think you're an asshole.
I'm literally in the bathroom for two minutes and I walk out to a random dude with his face in your tits
I don't even know if he's actually hot or just hot because he plays hockey..
You did not just say that.
It's so obvious he's evil. I mean, would a non-evil person have facial hair like that?
Look, I know why you're asking me, but just because I'm gay does not make me a wiki on butt sex. Ask a doctor or you know, the internet like everyone else.
Randomize
