It's like a choose-your-own-adventure. But the adventure is already chosen for you. And it sucks.
just learned how to wash a penis. thank you nursing school for getting me the most action i've had in months.
then again I'm sitting on a tree stump completely naked in the dark listening to some type of glee soundtrack.
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
Well, I just watched him puke into his pitcher at the bar, I doubt he cares about anything other than the fact that he needs a new beer.
We were on the balcony tossing jello shots to people passing below
When people said no i'd yell "i tried them i promise they aren't roofied!"
If it carries over into the weekend I would be glad to nurse your vagina back to health.
This whole bra on the outside of my shirt thing is so convenient. It turns my shirt into a pocket to eat Fritos out of. Mmm boobies
Uhm; your sign says 'Welcome to KFC' and for some reason I can't seem to open the door.
A guy wearing a shirt that says "eat shit and die motherfucker" just held open a door for me. He's got manners.
Huh interesting. Well thats too bad. Did he catch on?
I doubt it. After sex he sat there naked until the episode of fresh prince (which had JUST started) was over.
I'm sure he'll make the rejection quick and completely justified.
Y'know i appreciate how accepting you are of me being a terrible person.
You think that was bad? One time my parents found my sister half naked on top of the four runner in the garage. She makes me look like the good child.
I was trying to get nudes from last night and ended up getting a family portrait!
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