I felt like helen keller
But she could have totally found that shit before me
The dr is doing well, he randomly asked if I was bi
yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
When i walked in, you were in bed with a hot chick rolled up in a green blanket and said you were acting like a caterpillar..
Just so you know, coffee creamer+water does not = milk.
Its like everytime i see you, my vagina gets a heartbeat.
we traced the origins of this shit fest of a relationship back to a single instance of road head. then we did a reinacment
Do you think the neighbors will know I was the one giving out the penis shaped lollipops to the children?
She's popping painkillers like they're tic tacs and singing the soundtrack to dreamgirls. It's you're turn to babysit her.
Small children cheering my name. I am not a decent enough human being to feel comfortable with this.
I don't think she can come out, she went too hard in the Intro to Theater Drinking Game at 2:30
I'm going to crush up my last 7 Percocets into a fine powder and toss my popcorn in it.
Her delivery came. She's ordered a pack of 144 condoms.
Then years and years after that I will send you a picture of my warped vagina from all the kids that I had.
Randomize
