if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
Never underestimate the healing power of vomiting and a bath.
It was like some kind of slut recycling operation. She gave me the shirt of the last guy she slept with in exchabge for mine so I didn't have to wear the same thing to work. She's been doing it for years
Half my make-up was stuck to his thigh where I'd fallen asleep after the blowjob.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Somebody left a mini pitcher in the bathroom. Think its safe?
Going stoned out of mind to my sociology exam because it's really just a pizza party. I love community college.
Your friend, the one I told I would brush his teeth with my tongue, what's his name again?
No, no. The rest of his everything inspires me to put his dick in my mouth
I'm having a really difficult time dealing with the fact that my dog now shares a name with Snooki's crotch-spawn.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you started petting my head and said "there there, majestical unicorn. it won't be long before we get you back to neverland."
No, it's cool, I just bounced from the hospital. I was...talking to a security guard, maybe?
She asked if she should pack the condoms, I told her I plan on drinking so much that it won't be possible.
Our friendship just got weirder. He snapchated me the porn he was watching.
I mean, it's a romantic picture of pubes if I've ever seen one
The only thing i ask you for is vegan food and sex.
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