who let me buy 6 packs of big league chew? and eat them all? thats not cool
So I fucked that hot french guy last night
You do know he's the one who threw up on our table, right? You get to clean it up.
Drinking wine out of an empty soup can and watching spongebob squarepants.. I eveb hate myself
You should've stopped drinking when you started asking people for bites of tequila.
my mom just cut me up lemons and limes so i would have some vitamins with my tequlia
Omg just remembered. I tried to kidnap a dog.
I'm blaming hurricane Irene if I get pregnant tonight.
Im just saying it can't be that bad if he drove himself to the er. We'll head that way when we finish playing scattergories
Apparently, Mom was less-than-happy about us shotgunning beers before we opened presents.
There is a large scratch and bruise about the size of a pizza bagel next to my vagina. Please text back if you know what happened.
If life deals in absolutes, the in betweens are the most hairy.... Fortune cookie wisdom from a stoned Megan.
Lindsey Lohan and I have slept with the same amount of people. The only thing she's now beating me on is rehab trips and teen choice awards, so really I'm the winner.
i got kicked out of McDonald's for demanding a margarita mcflurry
my friends roomated asked me this morning if we went to mcdonalds last night and i had no idea...that is until i checked my purse and found half a mcdouble in it...
Finally hooked up with Ryan. Now I know why they call him “Beast Mode”. So. Many. Orgasms.
Randomize