I understand how i shit in my shoes, but explain why you were wearing them.
Dude, I just scraped frozen vomit from my rooftop
I really wish I could say this is a new low for you
i promise ill be ok...btw im only considered "not ok" if i end up in the hospital.
NO. NO LET HIS PENIS TOUCH YOU.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I loved your drunken rendition of "I wanna dance with somebody" that you left on my voicemail last night.
No, I got those cupcakes fair and square. That homeless man should have known not to underestimate the determination of a stoned chem student.
i just tried to use a string cheese as a light source
You said you were going to start drinking less. Drinking 25 small airplane bottle shots do not count.
Besides, I'm booked tomorrow. I'm planning on drinking heavily and crying in the bath.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's a mix of hot dirty sex and week old bong water
Must be why he thought choking was foreplay. Like WTF? No.
YOU ARE THE ONLY PERSON I KNOW THAT STEALTH CLEANS PEOPLE TOILETS
Stop thinking about me and go on your date... at least I got the glitter off your face first.
Etiquette question... How do you tell your mother that her nipple is out in her fb profile picture?
I'm still thinking about that amazing orgasm last night. I literally heard angels singing "Hallelujah!!"
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