How do you feel about the band name "O'labia Newton John"??
like we started out all organized and composed and within thirty mins people were throwing up in the bushes, arguing over a beer bong and jumping in the pool with their clothes on
Chipotle...archenemy of the gay man. Cockblocking me since 1997
Get everyone out of their dorms and watch 3 girls do the walk of shame from my room.
Also got home. Still stoned. Mom was up. We made a pizza and were writing a children's book. Sleep good.
I found the hair cut I want on the girl in the porno I'm watching. now really sure how to show my stylist.
i think when the guy sitting in the corner singing tells you you're too drunk, you're too drunk.
i went out at 5pm and cant remember anything until 3am...i was at the bus stop parking lot running around doing the Arrested Development chicken calls.
Treating myself to outback while reading the entire manual that comes with my birth control in public. Is this what single has come to?
He fingered me in a Waffle House bathroom and then stole a traffic cone. Is this love that I'm feeling?
If you magically turned into a tall white gay guy, ignore this message. If not, then I'm sure someone has your fb password.
Probably gonna run and pray I throw up. Then go get a coffee/bagel & continue to rally
I was going to be upset with you on moral grounds but then i realized free chocolate was involved
I just woke up to my family in the living room watching our security camera tape of me last night talking to a stop sign in our backyard... How the fuck did I get that in the yard?
Apparently I gave a guy a hand job on the dance floor. ON THE DANCE FLOOR.
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