watching jon and kate + 8 right now is like watching my parents split up
She said she never had to courage to go fully shaved. Since when did shaving your snatch become courageous?
And if not, hey- I've never had a restraining order before, so that will be cool
It could be our claim to fame
Done. I'll pack a cooler.
My epitaph should read "Margaritas: she never learned"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude i have an english essay and a bio lab due tomorow
so basically your not goin out tonight?
who said that?
I'm soaked in beer, and I think blood. Why did we think we could tap a keg with a hammer?
Tomorrow night wont work for me. I'm talking with Bryan about marriage and I dont want to have a shroom hangover.
I really think that guy just walks around with tennis balls in his pocket. No dick is that big
they adjusted my tv to black and white ... i thought i drank myself to colorblindness
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got stoned and explored ice caves with a guy who photographs dildos for a living. I win.
i’m just listening to christina aguilera’s “your body” on repeat and trying not to pass out at my desk.
She started throwing ice at me and started yelling, "Holy water bitches! This is an exorcism!"
WHY DON'T YOU WANT TO BE MY ESKIMO BRO
He forgot how to sit. we had to pick him up and set him down.
I look over and the both of you are naked, and he's eating chicken nuggets off the floor
Randomize