I had a bacon mcgriddle for the first time today. It was like eating a baby angel.
you left your dildo in my car
rules of finders keepers apply
Go for the frenulum. Its like eating a popsicle. They go nuts with that shit.
Ong my arms are moving wo my consent
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If you are drunk already, then as your friend I am advising you to stop writing on your dads Facebook wall
Who is Katie and why do we have her birthday cake?
At one point I was giving him a handjob and I started singing Call Me Maybe
He showed up in booty shorts and no shirt and said dont laugh dont ask questions and give me a fucking final and no one in class said anything we just sat there speehless
THERE ARE SO MANY ALCOHOLS IN MY BLOOD RIGHT NOW
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like he better crank it up to level RG IV tomorrow. It's the fucking playoffs.
It's only funny because he thinks you had sex with him to rob him.
I'm going to ride your dick until it falls off. That horny.
I'm equal parts terrified and turned on. Come over.
People don't believe me when I say the bruises are from work. They just smile and say "right." Trust me, I WISH my sex life was that exciting.
I need you to get the emergency bail money out if the stuffed panda and go to the police station tot bail me out. I should be there in 20 minutes.
Fuck this pandemic. She grabbed the hand sanitizer instead of the hand lotion while giving me a hand job and now my dick is burning and scrotum are on fire
A hand job? Are you 12?
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