they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
There's nothing worse than waking up naked on the beach covered in sand and a family walking by.
That sucks. I just talked to a telemarketer for 15 minutes about CSI: Miami and weed.
As punishment for throwing up on my car, I am holding your phone hostage until the morning. You can read this message after I drop it off.
Get dressed, I have 50$ and you need a new beer pong table since we threw yours off the 8th floor last night.
Check 'smoke weed with our ihop waiter' off of our To-Do List
I can't find a song to express how gay I'm feeling.
nothing out of the ordinary. you aplogized for having a spicy vagina and passed out
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
I want falafel more than sex right now. That's really saying something for me...
Is this really the life I've chosen for myself?
I really need to curb my attractions to blondes with tattoo sleeves, firearms and alcoholism
Sooo, did you delete me cause I said I wouldn't babysit you while you did shrooms? You're a grown man.
Recliner chair sex has moments of worry....just don't.
I feel like he doesn't realize we're offering him a threeway with sisters and I don't understand how that's possible.
Maybe we should bring mom next time.
Randomize
