Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
franzia sundays are my new favorite holiday
They thought "watering it down" meant adding more vodka
I vaguely remember trying to exfoliate my face with your leg hair. Sorry about that.
Whatever. That's why I am to be babied like a calf. I regret nothing.
Mmhmmm. I have a list of drunk achievement that is almost as long as my list of stoned achievements
Just text the random number in my iphone notes that was entered at 1am. Should be interesting.
Ah, drunk me ordered sushi at 3 a.m. for sober me's lunch the next day. EXCELLENT
I wrote "fuck you meg" on my toaster strudel with the icing. I call it "passive aggressive breakfast"
I'm driving home wearing one sock, boxers, and a tee shirt. That's how good it was
So... remember when you threw an orange in the closet when we were 16 to make wine? Just found it. Not wine.
Remember when I made fun of you when you ran out of toilet paper on your brother's birthday and had to use coffee filters? Guess what happened today
I thought my holiday spirit was gone this year until I got banged to Christmas music. It's back.
Last time I was blackout at Cowbells I was running around screaming “WHERES THE BLOOOWWWW”
Randomize
