Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
It's offcial there's a Bobby Light radio station on pandora.
Okay, guy from work I want to fuck just told me he liked the font on my PowerPoint presentation. It is so on.
Make me proud, climb that corporate ladder.
I've started grabbing my boobs in front of my lesbian philosophy professor so she'll give me a better grade. It's working...
I definitely did a line of something I don't know with a Pagan biker. I make good decisions.
Omg, looked at my call history, and judging by the times of calls it took me like half hour to walk home frommcds
jake and the teradactyl broke up, operation get high and find him a new girl who hasn't had sexual experiences with three delts simultaniously is in full effect.
The blow job award ceremony was a little much. You guys didn't need to call out what happened the night before.
What? How can you say that? You won!
Stop watching porn on my work computer.
STOP WORKING ON MY PORN COMPUTER.
I would use the term shit faced but I'm too polite for that
She's takin more dicks this month than I have in my life by the sounds of it
And the sexual frustration is like I'm wearing a damn horcrux
I had sex with two guys in one day. One on my grandma's couch, one on a golf course. This is the greatest post-surgery accomplishment I could ask for.
There's nothing like a guy talking about your vagina as if it's delicious food to make your day better.
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