8:17pm: So, How was fun day?
1:15am: So I just woke up in my bed in my bathing suit... I don't remember getting into bed or dinner or anything after slip n slide that happened around five... I'd say fun day was a success
Soo time for a life change, my 6 yr old sister made my gf a puke bucket for her birthday
Just found a partially digested mushroom under my bed. Thanks for that.
Dedicating my hangover to whoever the hell I hooked up with in the bathroom last night.
just kidding, dedicating it to the gods of mexican food. omnomnom
If I pissed all over some chicks bed I would probably apologize for getting so wasted, not putting out, and turning into a god damn R. Kelly Cinderella... Not ask for coffee and a ride home.
You and the dog were competed for the water dish
The shit I just took was four, very distinct colors. Jager night was a success
i went out at 5pm and cant remember anything until 3am...i was at the bus stop parking lot running around doing the Arrested Development chicken calls.
A warmed up burrito and jelly beans. The breakfast of champions.
She said she wanted you to slurp her vagina like a spaghetti noodle.
And for the record I didn't even have sex last night. I threw up in his toilet and slept in his bed until noon
Also, let me tell you how embarrassing it is to match with someone who seemingly has their shit together at 4:45AM on a Thursday.
Turns out end of the world sex is H-O-T, HOoot! I'll be the only progressive lady smiling today
This hangover is too legit right now. I just sneezed and almost puked
I didn't want to shower, so I shaved my legs in the pool . That drunk .
Randomize
