Sorry, its so late. Remember your fat friend with huge boobs. i need her number..its an emergency
Did he leave or is he still there?
He left right away, I might have passed out. I saw your text and was like who left where? Then the oh shit feeling sunk in, hangover starting now.
Best porno line to date...."drinks are on me..." while she female ejaculates into a wine chalice
She said she's saving anal for marriage cuz she has to save something for her husband...seriously just caught myself lookin at rings.
coming out of a blackout being surrounded by Disney police was not as awesome as it sounds.
the two person party stopped when i realized that he tried to throw a hammer at my head.
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
Have you ever had one of those moments when you kept whispering to yourself "I'm not a slut, I'm not a slut..."?
Luckily my prof thought I was puking from nerves and gave me motivational mini speeches the entire final.
Bro she gave me the stare. It's like she boned me with her eyes. I'm going in.
No. I either had a 6 minute orgasm or I had so many I lost count. I'm still not sure.
its the first football sunday and my boyfriend isn't excited. this isn't gonna last unless he makes me snacks and brings me beer during the game.
she's a drunken disney princess. so basically me if i had a crown and no desire for independence.
like when you break up with someone your virginity slowly starts to grow back & when it's done it's like ding ding ding you're ready to date again
when you wake up naked in a bed with glowsticks, a rolled ankle, a hangover, and a condom; alone. you wonder shit
Randomize
