Yo I charged a $20 breakfast to ur room, will pay u back in liquor and schoolgirl panties, thx again for a fun time
we need a dd. For wednesday. At lunch. What are we doing with our lives?
succeeding
Yeah he had his two razors labeled "face" and "pubes". Should I be disgusted or impressed?
he put a lighter in my cleavage and said "you're like another pocket!"
he's mad because you were 'slandering his penis'.
He came to my house drunk at two a.m., got in the hot tub, refused to get out until he smoked a blunt, and said "That's what brothers and sisters are for."
I got arrested for "public intoxication". Fuckers threw me out of the bar into public... i mean shit they have thirsty Thursdays. And I get thrown out for self serve Sundays plus a citation.
Concert was great. Tackled the lead singer. Met him afterwards. He was cool about it.
I just had some kinky fun in the back seat of my car behind a Ralph's in south county. How's your thanksgiving eve?
We took vodka shots. You kept saying it was the key to your heart.
What, I can't laugh at my sister being driven crazy by Facebook randomly assigning chat significance to the guy she lost her virginity to?
I wanted to write an apology letter to my vagina after that.
Just paid for birth control in all ones do you think she is judging me?
While I was giving him head he told me he had to go door to door the next day and "spread the word of Jesus Christ" I felt like a Disney villain out to steal his virtue.
Finally hooked up with Ryan. Now I know why they call him “Beast Mode”. So. Many. Orgasms.
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