She was like a white Oprah, but with less conviction.
Half Baked? Au contraire, Ben and Jerry, I was fully baked when I ate that whole pint of ice cream.
can you blame him?
i blame him for everything, HE GOT ME PREGNANT
I can't believe all I ate yesterday was half a turkey sandwich and 20 finger licks of exctasy.
It never fails.. every time I have a dick in my mouth he calls me.
FYI, when you wake up, please note that I puked in your shoes because I sstubbed my tooee, not becus I was drunk.
And there I was, sitting Indian style on the kitchen floor, my fingers covered in peanut butter.
No, my body just knows its the weekend and wants to rage. Very different from alcoholism
Hes screaming about Slender man. whatever hes on is probably not healthy.
I wasn't sure how he was going to followup "so,i shot myself.." i guess "w a nail gun" is the best choice out of what I expected
His wife made me pancakes and let me borrow a clean shirt. Should I drop his class or use this to my advantage
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
We found him sitting in the back of the club crying into a strippers lap. She told us he missed his pet frog and to come back later.
He's here walking around DRUNK AS FUCK in a Kobe Bryant number 8 jersey... Tucked in.
After everything I’ve done… had sex with people off tinder, gone to clubs and bars, gone to hockey games…. I get Covid at GRANDMAS HOUSE
Randomize
