**** and his GF asked me to give his stuff back, and they would give me a 100. HA, they dont know I have it to charity haha
You did not just nickname me "Nipples".
Definitely just saw a grown man at wal mart wearing high heels and carrying a baby
What the fuck were you doing at wal mart?
No matter what you may say to me. You will still be the guy that managed to get his own cum in his hair.
Im celebrating the fact that the one guy who has ever denied me has just come out of the closet
remind me not to fuck anymore half bald 20 year olds. because obviously there's attachment issues
besides i was ending his dry spell. it's written in the bible that jesus likes that right?
You strapped the bucket of KFC into the carseat and refused to let me drive over 20 miles per hour the whole ride home. That high.
You can't just take out your bong for hits in public places... That's what pipes are for. You've got to be stealthier.
No, it's okay because this is the city of trees.
YOU'VE ALREADY BEEN BUSTED MORE THAN ONCE. THAT'S NOT A VALID EXCUSE FOR BONG HITS IN COFFEE GARDEN
Fuck romance. Just shaved my nipples in the shower because I felt like it. That's the life I'm about.
We're at the liquor store. Then going to the hospital
Typical Sunday morning text...are you alive?
I just talked with someone about real estate trends in Atlanta then got three blowjobs in a row. Boom.
you blew the guy with all the harry potter paraphanelia didn't you
he had to stop me from eating snow off the street on the way back to pick up our cars. that's how hungover i am.
Randomize
