whats a more ladylike way to say "fuck me on your lunch break"?
never. drinking. again.
lets not get ahead of ourselves.
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
he asked if i wanted their team name to be " Amandas angels" or " Fuk budies" either way an intermural softball team of all my hook ups from spring semester is just depressing. convenient but depressing
i wish i had a super power and that that super power was shooting out mdma from my fingertips or something
Please never let me the drunk fat dancer in the bus girl
Prepare for tons of dick. I mean dick by the bucket loads. Waterfalls if cock.
Lets be real here, you loved it when I was on top. With and without the machete.
Might be time to reevaluate my life. Banned from red roofs inns. Apparently I puked in ice machine. 3 hotels in a year.
Im eating a cannibus peanut butter and jelly sandwich, while snuggling a stuffed animal. Either this flu is really really harsh or I'm some kind of stoner toddler
you can tell a lot about a person by the quality of their porn
Also, McDonald's breakfast is now 24/7. This is it. This is how I die. Face first in a pile of hashbrowns.
THEY HAVE BEEN GOING AT IT FOR 2 HOURS AND I HEAR THEM BANGING THIS IS BULLSHIT
i've got three words. i. was. spanked.
ugh my stomach is so upset-- didn't get a chance to take a violent enough hangover shit at work
Randomize
