I know it's VERY late and i know i may have burdened you, but on the chance that it's sat nite- are you up or willing to be? Christinas camping and i'm chillin alone.
do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
Really stoned
just sent my roommate on a cheese run
She was Ugg boots AND a Bumpit. Of course I didn't sleep with her.
Um, I don't really remember much about the event... and then I woke up on the metro..
I'm 2 blowjobs away from girlfriend status....don't tell me I don't know how to have an adult relationship
A letter to the campus apologizing for being sucha cunt with a picture of her head on it. All posted around campus.
Remind me if I threw up on you last night or if that was just a dream.
I forgot my id and a man called soup is buying me vodka.
Hickey on my chest, threw out my elbow and now walking out my shame.
Youre getting too old for this
Oh yes. Made out with a grandmother..... she had fake boobs and it was 330am. That makes it okay.
Mardi gras at its finest.
I am going to ride along with a cop tonight so please don't get arrested because that would be super awkward for me.
I'm out of town so we should be golden.
He actually has his life put together though, during the date we walked by a shoppers drugmart where my friend and I once flashed a janitor and all I could wonder was how does he not see shit show written all over me?
Ive already seen two fights and a clown urinating in the middle of the street. Hello Halloween 2014.
i'm high and self actualising, please send help
Randomize
