you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
If we get out of this alive, I'm never going to a Denny's at 3 am again.
he came within less than a minute of me blowing him. this was our second night hanging out in a row. for an almost 30 year old italian man, he is NOT living up to his country's reputation
Your two fuck buddies playing ping pong together. HOW. ADORABLE!
Just found the cutest bag of coke under my bed. I'm going to get fucked up and bleach the cat vomit out of my sheets.
She apologized again the next day. I said it was pee under the bridge
He is nice. Kind of short though. But didn't try to rub his jean cock on me.
Which I appreciated.
the liver wants what the liver wants
They're either celebrating their tax money or trying to kill each other.
Well, he asked what my sign was, then proceeded to critique me on my beer pong stance... I really need to raise my standards.
I think someone cast a spell on the lazy stoner rich boy stereotype and it came to life and called me.
CALL ME OLD FASHIONED BUT PEE IS FOR TOILETS
He has a beach house and a Simba tattoo. Our wedding is next Tuesday, hope you're free.
God specifically crafted these hands to deal out orgasms.
Randomize
