Captain Phil from deadliest catch died... im trying to think of a memorial fb status but "ill miss your crabs" doesnt sound right
Just woke up in a hotel next to a 38 year old mom who's married... I think Spring Break has started
I wish you would always start your sentences with "speaking of my clit..."
we ended up on her 9 year old brothers bed and he saw the whole thing.... now he will know how to use his equipment
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I thought I would take a shower to wake me up but now I'm naked wet and stoned laying on my bed instead of just stoned laying on my bed
Great. My funeral dress now smells of smoke and disappointing sex.
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
I called for backup and had two guys carry him to the shower. The bigger guy offered to wash his hair.
I'm not taking advise from someone who responded to the pickup line "I have a penis"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I found your knife. It was stuck in my bedroom ceiling.
Almost just bought a peacock. I need to get off Craigslist
Is there a polite way to say "Sorry for your head injury but I still want to hook up"?
Nice. I like it when Maker's Mark makes decisions for you.
If one more dude who finds out I'm a cop asks to see me in uniform I'm gonna become asexual
I finally selected an outfit that says "I'm not easy" but still shows off the tittays.
Randomize