I heard some girl say 'yeah he mustve been so drunk he kept mumbling and repeating himself'
And I thought
Fuck I do that shit every weekend
I just want you to know that me val and amanda are drinking on top of a hill lookig at the chicago skyline drinking icehouse and we just peed in public.
She told me that she faked her orgasm. Does she think I care??
What tipped you off? The sombrero?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
his name is not nearly as fun as i thought to yell out in bed
Of course he got arrested. He was wearing a toga. Even Tom Hanks couldn't act sober in a toga.
Pretty sure I saw a dude across the room give this girl the international hand gesture for "I'm going to fist you later", she seemed ok with it.
she ate the whole pudding cup using only her tongue. i'm considering going lesbian for her
Oh so it was one of those "I shouldn't have gotten in a cab with a random 21 year old girl" kinda nights.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yikes. I usually have a 24-hour waiting period between sex partners. You know, like for a handgun.
Just sitting in the tub googling "how to remove sharpie from skin". You?
did you just try to prove your straightness by quoting a lady gaga song?
My liver is going to reject life during Greek Week
How many liver transplants can a person have? Bc you may need a couple
Thanks for supporting me through Robs retirement. I'm still in shock, but your dick helped.
Yeah. I got a Tetnus shot then partied like it was 1999.
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