if any two of us come back from the bar and aren't getting laid we will systematically destroy everything in the kitchen
when I'm not with you everything just looks like crayon scribble
Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
Marriage: a sacred union between one man and one woman, and another woman in Argentina.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just heard an old guy ask the chick he was with if she wanted to try ass to mouth...
thanks for that.
where are you?
Hypothermia
Half of elefante. Gelafin galaxy
he's home with a concussion now...but apparently i'm still the highlight of his freshman year
idk, it started getting weird when they were looking up videos of lesbian giraffes
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So fucking hammered. Is this all spelled right? I'm holding it up to my eye. I am on a boulder. I feel like an owl
What is your life?
A tangled mess of finals and bad decisions.
If I had 3 wishes one would for sure be a designated driver for life that gives hand jobs.
I'll pay you back with progressively deviant sexual favors.
I've never been so excited to have my ass in so much pain.
He has a baby picture of himself on the night stand. I don't think this whole 'one night stand' thing is for me.
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